Make Yourself A Priority

📸 : Sunken Gardens, 2022

It’s not selfish or a sign of weakness to distance yourself or walk away from those who constantly bring down your vibe. Life is about balance. It’s about spreading kindness, but it’s also about not letting anyone take that kindness away from you. 

Do you think it’s selfish to put yourself first? Depending on the context, it can be selfish to think of yourself and not others. For example, if a pie is cut into eight equal pieces and there are eight hungry people in the room, it would be selfish of you to take two pieces. 

However, it’s often important to put yourself first. You have a lot of energy to give, but you must save some of that energy for yourself. You came into this world alone and you’ll leave on your own, I remember one of my exes said like that.  :) 

Your longest relationship in life is with yourself. Only when you manage this relationship well can you manage your relationships with others. 

Ideally, we want to be in a place where our mood doesn’t shift because of someone else’s behavior, but only the most spiritually evolved among us are able to do this — to demonstrate unconditional, ongoing love in spite of others’ actions towards us. Most of us still have a long way to go before we ascend into states of consciousness high enough to allow us to love all people without condition or expectation. 

If we aren’t spiritually evolved individuals, then constant interaction with toxic people can suck the energy out of us, which in time will make us feel drained. 

It is much easier to see the good in life when you are around positive people. 

Your personal growth is an ongoing process and it ca take a long time to get to a place where you’re unaffected by other people’s behavior. 

So sometimes you have to cut out those people who continuously cut you. They’re venomous and restrict your progress. After all, it’s hard to function, not to mention crack a smile, when someone keeps feeding you poison. Think of a plant: if you keep it under toxic conditions, it can’t grow and will soon start to wither. But, under the right conditions, it’ll thrive and grow into something beautiful. Once it becomes big and strong, it’s hard to destroy. 

People can be toxic, too. A toxic people might be someone who criticizes everything you do; expects too much; lacks respect; shows very little support. They might ridicule, neglect, physically abuse, manipulate and belittle you. These people are usually unwilling to confront their toxic actions and make changes. 

So when you find yourself around people who are toxic towards you, your inner peace will be lost and you’ll be more likely to pass on the pain this causes you to others. This begs the question: is it selfish to think of ourselves here, or is it selfish of them to expect that we should be okay with it? 

Ending a toxic relationship can be incredibly difficult; it’s hard to break free from those close to you, even if they’re hurting you. But once you remove those people from your life, you make way for a river of positivity to flow. You’ll have time and space for introspection, healing, and growth, and like the plant, you too will become strong. 

Love, 
Ms. Elista